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shaunie. eighteen. cis. white. here for all the ladies and scott mccall. part-time blogger. dutchie.

WHY I'M NOT ACTIVE

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10.10.14

i honestly can’t stand it anymore. my dad has been emotionally abusing me for so long now and each week i’m getting more scared that it’s going to turn into physical abuse because that has happened to my brother in the past. i’m so sick of him always making me feel like shit and not giving a damn about how i feel, only when it benefits him. i just want to leave but don’t know where the fuck i should go because the only reason i’m living here is because my mom didn’t want me anymore

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01.10.14

savingsciles replied to your post “this is something i wanted to say for a long time now so i’m just…”

I can understand why you aren’t asking people to tag triggers for it, because I wouldn’t know what to tag and what not to. I hope you’ll continue to be here, and you still have my follow :) I hope you’re okay.

yep! the smallest and silliest things can trigger me like a complete gifset of funny quotes of a character and then suddenly there’s a quote that’s more sad than funny, or a gif with someone touching their hair with their left hand. those things just don’t feel right to me because it has to be even. pretty sure 95% of my dash would be blocked, lol.

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01.10.14

pascalspedro replied to your post “this is something i wanted to say for a long time now so i’m just…”

Hope you are alright love. Tumblr was a safe place for me after my attack and all my friends here keep me okay. You can always talk to me :) <3

i’m fine - i just felt like getting it of my chest because i’ve been feeling guilty for not coming on here for so long. i’m so happy for you that tumblr is able to be a safe place! and that’s so sweet of you :)

Not ALL men.
Yes, all men. Every single one of them.
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01.10.14

this is something i wanted to say for a long time now so i’m just gonna do it now before i change my mind again.

you might have noticed (or probably not - most people that did notice have unfollowed me already) i’m not online that often anymore. mostly because i started college and some other things i rather not talk about. but a huge part is also thanks to me being triggered so often lately here on tumblr.
the past few months my ocd had been getting worse and worse and there are so many small things that can trigger it. yes, a lot of people are willing to trigger tag things but i simply can’t ask people to tag these things because they’re not as simple as ‘blood cw’ or ‘gore cw’ because tbh the smallest things can trigger me.
my ocd mostly has to do with things being ‘uneven’ and i’m not always triggered by the little things but once i get triggered from there on it gets worse and worse. 
so yeah, idk. ofc i’m still gona be on tumblr because i don’t want my ocd to take away something from my life i used to enjoy so much. 

anyway, thanks for reading if you did and please do not think of this as a ‘i’m sad don’t unfollow me pls!’ because if you want to unfollow me for being inactive, do just that. it’s your choice. but atleast now you’ll know the reason behind me being so inactive. and if you do decide to keep following me - thank you so much for the (even if you don’t know you’re giving it) support.

DTHM.